Ask A Woman is an annoymous advice blog that will be selecting choice questions to be answered on Asheville Grit. Read her introduction piece here, and visit her blog to learn more and of course, ask away.
We welcome you, Ms. Eve S. Dropper.
- Asheville Grit
Dear Woman,
Wondering if you could shine some light on something. I’m wondering why women ruin their looks with crazy tattoos & piercings. Especially here in Asheville I see so many beautiful women who are practically dressed up in costumes and covered in ink and jewelry. What’s the purpose of this? Don’t they know they’re making themselves less attractive to good, wholesome guys?
Thanks,
Genuinely Curious
Dear Genuinely Curious,
Okay, I’m probably going to get into some hot water for telling you this but here’s the truth. It’s a defense mechanism against robots. You see, AI’s cannot compute our body art and jewelry so they categorize us as predators which we’re hoping will give us the time we need to safely get into our bunkers once the apocalypse comes.
In short, we do it to deter and confuse robots for survival reasons. But there are a couple of other reason why we adorn ourselves. I can’t speak for all women who enjoy body art but I’m guessing some do it because it makes them feel powerful and protected. Some do it to commemorate people they have lost or experiences they have had. Some do it because they want to be a living work of art or wish to have their style reflect their lifestyles. *1 I personally do it because I think tattoos are beautiful and since this body of mine is temporary, I think it’s fun to adorn and decorate it. I also enjoy being part of a subculture, I enjoy being part of a tribe and, because I wasn’t born into one, I choose one for myself.
I think we can all agree that it’s pretty much a win-win that you don’t find us attractive, though. I am being authentically true to myself and presenting myself in a way that I find beautiful. Because of this I mainly attract like-minded individuals who also find my expression beautiful. That’s not you and that’s great. You might prefer for women to have the grey, translucent skin of someone who’s been keep in a basement most of their lives. We all have different tastes. You yourself might show your individuality by spiking your bleached hair and wearing your sunglasses on the back of your head and that’s your own freak flag to fly.* 2
What’s concerning about your question is that I worry that you view woman solely as visual snacks. Appreciating a person's beauty in a respectful way is healthy and normal, but when you start to get personally offended when a woman’s fashion choices clash with what you find attractive, that gets into some weird controlling territory and I would urge you to explore why you are reacting that way.
While I have you here let me just add that a woman having a tattoo (or a unique piercing or rainbow dreadlocks that cascade down her back) does not give you the right to touch her without her permission. Unless you are literally trying to save someone's life, don’t touch people without asking. Don’t touch our babies, don’t touch our tattoos, don’t touch our hair. Just don’t.
Sincerely,
A Woman
*1 For some reason women with tattoos are often viewed as being promiscuous and this is simply not true as a whole. Don’t even get me started on the problematic word itself which is commonly used to attack a women’s right to be free with her sexuality if she so chooses. I don’t know how this rumor got started but it seems to me that when a woman does not fit inside a box of what is deemed socially acceptable, labels are slapped on them as a way to alienate and ostracize them. This happens all the time and it is utter bullshit.
*2 I’m talking about Guy Fieri, anytime I use this description it’s always a reference to Guy Fieri. I mention him kind of a lot.
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